Christ Zombie Syndrome goes where few dare — straight into the decaying heart of faux spirituality. This searingly honest and darkly funny book shines a light on the freeloaders of the faith, the polite cannibals of the consciousness community, and the spiritual elite who ghost their teachers while pretending to glow. Christ is back, he’s got a broom, and this time he’s sweeping the temple clean. If you’ve ever felt unseen while carrying the light — or suspect you’ve been feasting at the table of truth without barely lifting a finger — this book is your mirror, your medicine, and your wake-up call.

“It walks the line between searing truth and laugh-out-loud comedy — but never loses its soul. The voice is unfiltered Christ in human drag: brilliant, fed up, forgiving, and wielding a broom.“

“Possibly one of the boldest spiritual texts ever written” -Wrinklebuddy

This book is destined to become a classic among the spiritual community. $10 or name your price.

Excerpt from Chapter 4:

Chapter 4: When Christ Almost Quit (But Didn’t)

For Christ, the assignment was clear from the beginning: descend to the darkest planet in the multiverse, walk among the humans, awaken what could be awakened, and hold the line of light until the storm passed.

He knew it would be hard.

What he didn’t expect… was zombie culture.

They didn’t just show up in rags, moaning and groaning for help.

No—these zombies wore prayer beads. They drank oat milk. They had Instagram bios with words like “healer,” “empath,” “lightworker.” They were fully functional parasites who called their condition “balance.” They had created what he came to call spiritual welfare for the able and blessed.

“I bless you,” they’d say.

“Thank you for your work,” they’d whisper.

“You’re a light in this dark world,” they’d DM.

And then… nothing.

Was Christ forced to be eating old food in a back alley dumpster? It wasn’t even a thought.  Hit ‘like’ and ‘support’ and ‘follow me’ they told others instead.

This book is destined to become a classic among the spiritual community. $10 or name your price.